Alexandra Burke tearfully describes how her beloved mother, 53, died

Alexandra Burke has spoken out about the moment her beloved mother Melissa Bell ‘died in my arms’. 

The X Factor singer, 32, lost her mother aged 53 in 2017, when she was touring around the country with the stage show Sister Act. 

Featuring in Elizabeth Day’s How To Fail podcast, Alexandra revealed her biggest regret was not quitting the tour when her mother suffered a stroke eight months prior to her death. 

Traumatic: Alexandra Burke has spoken out about the moment her beloved mother Melissa Bell ‘died in my arms’

Alexandra tearfully told how she used to sleep on the hospital floor after driving for hours to see her mother following a show. It wasn’t until Alexandra’s final performance in Blackpool that she got a phone call telling her she needed to visit her mother urgently. 

She recalled: ‘When my mum fell sick it all happened so suddenly, she just spiralled. 

‘Everything was fine one minute and then all of a sudden she had a stroke. It was like she was two different people.

So sad: The X Factor singer, 32, lost her mother aged 53 in 2017, when she was touring around the country with Sister Act (pictured in 2012)

So sad: The X Factor singer, 32, lost her mother aged 53 in 2017, when she was touring around the country with Sister Act (pictured in 2012)

‘I had eight months left and I sat her down in hospital and said: “Mum I’m going to quit the tour”, and do you know what she said? “First of all I didn’t raise a quitter and she said you get your black a***e on stage. People have paid to watch you perform.’

Alexandra said she decided to follow her mother’s wishes but would have her phone by the stage providing updates on her condition. 

She continued: ‘If something had happened to her I would leave the show and then I would drive wherever I was Manchester, Sheffield, I would sleep on the hospital floor, then drive back to London. 

‘I would see to family, stay the night and go back and do the show. 

Regret: Alexandra revealed her biggest regret was not quitting the tour when her mother suffered a stroke eight months prior to her death (pictured in 2016)

Regret: Alexandra revealed her biggest regret was not quitting the tour when her mother suffered a stroke eight months prior to her death (pictured in 2016)

‘I can’t tell you how amazing the NHS doctors and nurses when they sat her down and told her “you have 72 hours to live”, she gave us another eight months.  

‘She gave us another Christmas, a birthday each, a mother’s day. Then the last day of my show, I finished in Blackpool, I was driving back to London and I got a call saying “you need to come to hospital now” so I drove to hospital and within 10 minutes she died in my arms.’ 

‘So I lost those nine months, I regret going on tour. I regret it so deeply, I had so much time on the road than with my mum. I should have just told my mum “look you’re my priority, I want to quit the tour and be with you”.  

‘My mum wouldn’t have want it any other way but putting work first that is something now I won’t do at times. 

 ‘I was 29 when my mum passed away and I was so lucky to have my mummy for 29 years. What we shared, our memories we created together, money can’t buy that.’

Tough: During the interview, Alexandra also reflected on what it was like as a black female artist in the music industry (pictured in 2008 on The X Factor)

Tough: During the interview, Alexandra also reflected on what it was like as a black female artist in the music industry (pictured in 2008 on The X Factor)

During the interview, Alexandra also reflected on what it was like as a black female artist in the music industry. 

She said: ‘I was sat down and told “you’re never going to be good enough because of you’re colour. You’re never going to sell a set amount of records because you don’t appeal to a certain audience”. 

‘I was told to bleach my skin and that I would never perform on the BRITs. And all of that is b******t. It’s ridiculous. 

‘I was never brave enough when I sat there ten years ago to say “well if that’s the case, I’m just going to work really hard to achieve everything you’ve just said I can’t”. 

‘I have proved you wrong in some kind of way, I’ve done my best to achieve things around me. 

‘Keeping that strong face and spirits up is very difficult.’

Alexandra said because she has put work first she feels like her personal life has suffered- especially when it comes to relationships. 

'There's only one relationship where I felt like I could be myself in my whole life, when I was engaged to my partner Josh,' she said, tearfully (pictured with Josh Ginnelly in 2016)

‘There’s only one relationship where I felt like I could be myself in my whole life, when I was engaged to my partner Josh,’ she said, tearfully (pictured with Josh Ginnelly in 2016)

Case of the ex: Alexandra went on to have a relationship with Angus MacDonald after 15 months of dating (pictured last year)

Case of the ex: Alexandra went on to have a relationship with Angus MacDonald after 15 months of dating (pictured last year)

‘There’s only one relationship where I felt like I could be myself in my whole life, when I was engaged to my partner Josh,’ she said, tearfully.

Alexandra became engaged to Josh Ginnelly in 2018 after several years of dating. 

In July 2019, three weeks after separating from her fiancé, Burke was photographed with new boyfriend, Hull City defender Angus Macdonald during their date at the Wimbledon Tennis Championships.

By August 2019, Macdonald was diagnosed with bowel cancer. 

The couple’s affectionate relationship with each other and her acknowledged supportive role, saw the recovered Angus continue as a couple until they announced their separation on the 21 October 2020. 

Reflecting on where things have gone wrong, she said: ‘I am always pleasing the other person, I don’t even know who I am because I’m not thinking of me. 

‘I had a plan in my head that by the time I was 30, I would be married and have kids. 

‘And I have put so much pressure on myself to deliver that and I wanted to do it for my mum and I wanted her to see it.   

‘I don’t have any sadness that it hasn’t happened but I know it will happen in time, but I do feel sad I haven’t been my authentic self in relationships.’

The Broken Heels hitmaker said it wasn’t until last October when she filmed a show for a week that she began to feel better mentally after ‘breaking my body’. 

She said: ‘I filmed in show in October just gone. I broke my ribs because of it. I have only just healed properly. I had a sprained ankle

‘I  came back broken but I came back from that show stronger. I really feel that my experience that I had in that week really changed everything for me. 

‘My life was upside down in a great way. 

‘My body was completely in pieces, for me to realise I deserve a lot more.’

Broken ribs: The Broken Heels hitmaker said it wasn't until last October when she filmed a show for a week that she began to feel better mentally after 'breaking my body'

Broken ribs: The Broken Heels hitmaker said it wasn’t until last October when she filmed a show for a week that she began to feel better mentally after ‘breaking my body’

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